

I'll never know where I found the courage. The next thing I knew, I was sharing her bed. I was only thirteen, and the wine went to my head, I fear. We finished two whole chickens and part of a third, and drank a flagon of wine, talking. She was hungrier than I would have believed. The girl was too frightened to send her off by herself, though, so I offered to take her to the closest inn and feed her while my brother rode back to the Rock for help. She was a crofter's child, orphaned when her father died of fever, on her way to. By the time he came trotting back, I'd gotten a name out of her, and a story. They'd torn the rags she was wearing half off her back, so I wrapped her in my cloak while Jaime chase the men into the woods. “She was scarcely a year older than I was, dark-haired, slender, with a face that would break your heart. When he opened the door, the light from within threw his shadow clear across the yard, and for just a moment Tyrion Lannister stood tall as a king.” All dwarfs may be bastards, yet not all bastards need be dwarfs.“ And with that he turned and sauntered back into the feast, whistling a tune. Most of them are.“ He favored Jon with a rueful grin. „I don't even know who my mother was,“ Jon said. My mother died birthing me, and he's never been sure.“ „You are your mother's trueborn son of Lannister.“ „All dwarfs are bastards in their father's eyes.“ „What do you know about being a bastard?“

Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.“ „Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. „Let me give you some counsel, bastard,“ Lannister said. He was pleased by the dwarf's comment, but he tried not to let it show.

You have more of the north in you than your brothers.“ „Lord Eddard Stark is my father,“ Jon admitted stiffly. Generations of capering fools in motley have won me the right to dress badly and say any damn thing that comes into my head.“ He grinned. He pressed his lips together and said nothing. Season 1 left me excited for season 2 Love how even the most loyal and Nobel characters don’t get spared. Favorites so far are Jon snow, Daenerys Targaryen, Tyrion Lannister. Jon felt a coldness pass right through him. NO SPOILERS Finished season oneSo many people want revenge. if you deliver the message, and I live, which I very much intend to do.“„You're Ned Stark's bastard, aren't you?“ Here are the finest, funniest, rudest and wisest sayings of the miniature Machiavelli the dwarf with a brain the size of. Of course, you have also heard the phrase "a Lannister always pays his debts". Have you ever heard the phrase "rich as a Lannister"? When they captured me, they took my purse, but the gold is still mine! Listen to me! Sometimes possession is an abstract concept. I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel. I made the bald man cry into the turtle stew, which I do believe my sister ate. I flogged the one-eyed snake, I skinned my sausage. When I was twelve I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. Poor boy was flogged, and I escaped justice.
#Tyrion lannister quotes funny full#
When confronted with my crime, I blamed a squire. Shaggar: How would you like to die, Tyrion, son of Tywin Tyrion: In my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly full of wine and a girls mouth around my cock. When I was ten, I stuffed my uncle's boots with goat shit. If I close my eyes, I can still see her tits bouncing. Cersei should know better than to insult Tyrions intelligence as he makes clear with his retort to her. I stole her robe and she was forced to return to the castle naked and in tears. When I was seven, I saw a servant girl bathing in the river. I'm not particularly good at violence, but I'm good at convincing others to do violence for me. I have lied and cheated, gambled and whored. Where do I begin, my lords and ladies? I am a vile man, I confess it. The sky cells always break them! Speak, Imp.
